The pressure to conform

PEER AND OTHER PRESSURES

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Dr. Paul Manuel—2007

How independent are you? Are the decisions you make or the opinions you hold yours alone, or are they influenced (even coerced) by others, a person or a group whose approval you hope to win or whose support you think you need? There are many people who might have you behave or believe in a certain way, not because it is in your best interest but because it benefits them, supporting their agenda or simply demonstrating their power over others. Such pressures come in various forms and from various sources, but they often have the same purpose: influencing you in a way that is not necessarily to your benefit. To examples in scripture of such pressure, people have responded variously.

I. Peer pressure

A. In response to pressure from other prophets to misrepresent God, Micaiah resisted (1 Kgs 22:13-14).

1 Kgs 22:13 The messenger who had gone to summon Micaiah said to him, "Look, as one man the other prophets are predicting success for the king. Let your word agree with theirs, and speak favorably." 14 But Micaiah said, "As surely as the LORD lives, I can tell him only what the LORD tells me."

B. In response to pressure from other prophets to misrepresent God, Micah resisted (Mic 2:6).

Mic 2:6 "Do not prophesy," their prophets say. "Do not prophesy about these things; disgrace will not overtake us."

C. In response to pressure from other religious leaders to misrepresent God, Jeremiah resisted (Jer 26:11-13).¹

Jer 26:11 Then the priests and the prophets said to the officials and all the people, "This man should be sentenced to death because he has prophesied against this city. You have heard it with your own ears!" 12 Then Jeremiah said to all the officials and all the people: "The LORD sent me to prophesy against this house and this city all the things you have heard. 13 Now reform your ways and your actions and obey the LORD your God. Then the LORD will relent and not bring the disaster he has pronounced against you.

D. In response to pressure from his contemporaries to oppress Israel, Rehoboam relented (1 Kgs 12:8).

1 Kgs 12:8 But Rehoboam rejected the advice the elders gave him and consulted the young men who had grown up with him and were serving him.

E. In response to pressure from his soldiers to kill Saul, David resisted (1 Sam 24:10).

1 Sam 24:10 This day you have seen with your own eyes how the LORD delivered you into my hands in the cave. Some urged me to kill you, but I spared you; I said, 'I will not lift my hand against my master, because he is the LORD's anointed.'

F. In response to pressure from fellow Jews to separate from gentile believers, Peter relented (Gal 2:12-13).

Gal 2:12 Before certain men came from James, he used to eat with the Gentiles. But when they arrived, he began to draw back and separate himself from the Gentiles because he was afraid of those who belonged to the circumcision group. 13 The other Jews joined him in his hypocrisy, so that by their hypocrisy even Barnabas was led astray.

II. Social pressure

A. In response to pressure from his community to behave wickedly, Noah resisted (Gen 6:5, 8-9).

Gen 6:5 The LORD saw how great man's wickedness on the earth had become, and that every inclination of the thoughts of his heart was only evil all the time.... 8 But Noah found favor in the eyes of the LORD. 9 This is the account of Noah. Noah was a righteous man, blameless among the people of his time, and he walked with God.

B. In response to pressure from their host to drink wine, the Recabites resisted (Jer 35:6).

Jer 35:6 But they replied, "We do not drink wine, because our forefather Jonadab son of Recab gave us this command: 'Neither you nor your descendants must ever drink wine.

C. In response to pressure from Jewish neighbors to persecute Paul and Barnabas, God-fearing women of Pisidian Antioch relented (Acts 13:50).

Acts 13:50 But the Jews incited the God-fearing women of high standing and the leading men of the city. They stirred up persecution against Paul and Barnabas, and expelled them from their region.

D. In response to pressure from Anathoth assassins to stop prophesying, Jeremiah resisted (Jer 11:21-22).

Jer 11:21 "Therefore this is what the LORD says about the men of Anathoth who are seeking your life and saying, 'Do not prophesy in the name of the LORD or you will die by our hands'-22 therefore this is what the LORD Almighty says: 'I will punish them. Their young men will die by the sword, their sons and daughters by famine.

E. In response to pressure from a widow to grant her justice, a reluctant judge relented (Luke 18:3-5).

Luke 18:3 And there was a widow in that town who kept coming to him with the plea, 'Grant me justice against my adversary.' 4 "For some time he refused. But finally he said to himself, 'Even though I don't fear God or care about men, 5 yet because this widow keeps bothering me, I will see that she gets justice, so that she won't eventually wear me out with her coming!"

F. In response to pressure from their audience to predict prosperity, false prophets relented (Mic 2:11; cf. 2 Tim 4:3).

Mic 2:11 If a liar and deceiver comes and says, 'I will prophesy for you plenty of wine and beer,' he would be just the prophet for this people!

2 Tim 4:3 For the time will come when men will not put up with sound doctrine. Instead, to suit their own desires, they will gather around them a great number of teachers to say what their itching ears want to hear.

III. Political pressure

A. In response to pressure from his advisors to change the official religion of Israel, King Joash relented (2 Chr 24:1718).²

2 Chr 24:17 After the death of Jehoiada, the officials of Judah came and paid homage to the king, and he listened to them. 18 They abandoned the temple of the LORD, the God of their fathers, and worshiped Asherah poles and idols. Because of their guilt, God's anger came upon Judah and Jerusalem.

B. In response to the pressure from his constituents to execute Jeremiah, the Judean king Zedekiah resisted (Jer 38:1).

Jer 38:1 Shephatiah son of Mattan, Gedaliah son of Pashhur, Jehucal son of Shelemiah, and Pashhur son of Malkijah heard what Jeremiah was telling all the people when he said,

C. In response to pressure from his constituents to execute Jesus, the Roman governor Pilate relented (Luke 23:23-24).

Luke 23:23 But with loud shouts they insistently demanded that he be crucified, and their shouts prevailed. 24 So Pilate decided to grant their demand.

D. In response to pressure from King Nebuchadnezzar to worship an idol, the Jews resisted (Dan 3:18).

Dan 3:18 But even if he does not, we want you to know, O king, that we will not serve your gods or worship the image of gold you have set up."

E. In response to pressure from King Darius to forsake prayer, Daniel resisted (Dan 6:10).

Dan 6:10 Now when Daniel learned that the decree had been published, he went home to his upstairs room where the windows opened toward Jerusalem. Three times a day he got down on his knees and prayed, giving thanks to his God, just as he had done before.

IV. Financial pressure

A. In response to pressure from his potential employer to speak against Israel, Balaam relented (Num 22:7-22; cf. 2 Pet 2:15).

Num 22:7 The elders of Moab and Midian left, taking with them the fee for divination. When they came to Balaam, they told him what Balak had said. 8 "Spend the night here," Balaam said to them, "and I will bring you back the answer the LORD gives me." So the Moabite princes stayed with him. 9 God came to Balaam and asked, "Who are these men with you?" 10 Balaam said to God, "Balak son of Zippor, king of Moab, sent me this message: 11 'A people that has come out of Egypt covers the face of the land. Now come and put a curse on them for me. Perhaps then I will be able to fight them and drive them away." 12 But God said to Balaam, "Do not go with them. You must not put a curse on those people, because they are blessed." 13 The next morning Balaam got up and said to Balak's princes, "Go back to your own country, for the LORD has refused to let me go with you." 14 So the Moabite princes returned to Balak and said, "Balaam refused to come with us." 15 Then Balak sent other princes, more numerous and more distinguished than the first. 16 They came to Balaam and said: "This is what Balak son of Zippor says: Do not let anything keep you from coming to me, 17 because I will reward you handsomely and do whatever you say. Come and put a curse on these people for me." 18 But Balaam answered them, "Even if Balak gave me his palace filled with silver and gold, I could not do anything great or small to go beyond the command of the LORD my God. 19 Now stay here tonight as the others did, and I will find out what else the LORD will tell me." 20 That night God came to Balaam and said, "Since these men have come to summon you, go with them, but do only what I tell you." 21 Balaam got up in the morning, saddled his donkey and went with the princes of Moab. 22 But God was very angry when he went, and the angel of the LORD stood in the road to oppose him. Balaam was riding on his donkey, and his two servants were with him.

2 Pet 2:15 They have left the straight way and wandered off to follow the way of Balaam son of Beor, who loved the wages of wickedness.

B. In response to pressure from his potential benefactor to accept some remuneration, Elisha resisted (2 Kgs 5:16, contra v. 20).

2 Kgs 5:16 The prophet answered, "As surely as the LORD lives, whom I serve, I will not accept a thing." And even though Naaman urged him, he refused.

2 Kgs 5:20 Gehazi, the servant of Elisha the man of God, said to himself, "My master was too easy on Naaman, this Aramean, by not accepting from him what he brought. As surely as the LORD lives, I will run after him and get something from him."

V. Sexual pressure

A. In response to the pressure from Potiphar's wife to commit adultery, Joseph resisted (Gen 39:7-10).

Gen 39:7 and after a while his master's wife took notice of Joseph and said, "Come to bed with me!" 8 But he refused. "With me in charge," he told her, "my master does not concern himself with anything in the house; everything he owns he has entrusted to my care. 9 No one is greater in this house than I am. My master has withheld nothing from me except you, because you are his wife. How then could I do such a wicked thing and sin against God?" 10 And though she spoke to Joseph day after day, he refused to go to bed with her or even be with her.

B. In response to pressure from Moabite women to commit immorality, Israel relented (Num 25:1-3).

Num 25:1 While Israel was staying in Shittim, the men began to indulge in sexual immorality with Moabite women, 2 who invited them to the sacrifices to their gods. The people ate and bowed down before these gods. 3 So Israel joined in worshiping the Baal of Peor. And the LORD's anger burned against them.

C. In response to pressure from a seductive woman to commit adultery, the sage counsels resistance (Prov 5:3).³

Prov 5:3 For the lips of an adulteress drip honey, and her speech is smoother than oil: 4 but in the end she is bitter as gall, sharp as a double-edged sword.

VI. Religious pressure

A. In response to pressure from Moabite neighbors to practice idolatry, Israel relented (Num 25:1-3).⁴

Num 25:1 While Israel was staying in Shittim, the men began to indulge in sexual immorality with Moabite women, 2 who invited them to the sacrifices to their gods. The people ate and bowed down before these gods. 3 So Israel joined in worshiping the Baal of Peor. And the LORD's anger burned against them.

B. In response to pressure from his community to acknowledge Jesus, Peter's resisted (Matt 26:69-74).

Matt 26:69 Now Peter was sitting out in the courtyard, and a servant girl came to him. "You also were with Jesus of Galilee," she said. 70 But he denied it before them all. "I don't know what you're talking about," he said. 71 Then he went out to the gateway, where another girl saw him and said to the people there, "This fellow was with Jesus of Nazareth." 72 He denied it again, with an oath: "I don't know the man!" 73 After a little while, those standing there went up to Peter and said, "Surely you are one of them, for your accent gives you away." 74 Then he began to call down curses on himself and he swore to them, "I don't know the man!" Immediately a rooster crowed.

VII. Familial pressure

A. In response to pressure from Naomi, her mother-in-law, to avoid prejudice, Ruth resisted (Ruth 1:16).

Ruth 1: 16 ...Ruth replied, "Don't urge me to leave you or to turn back from you. Where you go I will go, and where you stay I will stay. Your people will be my people and your God my God."

B. In response to pressure from Jezebel, his wife, to practice idolatry, Ahab relented (1 Kgs 21:25-26).

1 Kgs 21:25 (There was never a man like Ahab, who sold himself to do evil in the eyes of the LORD, urged on by Jezebel his wife. 26 He behaved in the vilest manner by going after idols, like the Amorites the LORD drove out before Israel.)

C. In response to pressure from other youth to sin, a father counsels his son to resist (Prov 1:10-19).⁵

Prov 1:10 My son, if sinners entice you, do not give in to them. 11 If they say, "Come along with us; let's lie in wait for someone's blood, let's waylay some harmless soul; 12 let's swallow them alive, like the grave, and whole, like those who go down to the pit; 13 we will get all sorts of valuable things and fill our houses with plunder; 14 throw in your lot with us, and we will share a common purse"— 15 my son, do not go along with them, do not set foot on their paths; 16 for their feet rush into sin, they are swift to shed blood.... 18 These men lie in wait for their own blood; they waylay only themselves! 19 Such is the end of all who go after ill-gotten gain; it takes away the lives of those who get it.

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The associations you choose to make are indicative of your character—of the values you esteem and of the goals you want to pursue—as well as of your end, or at least the one toward which you are reaching.

Prov 13:20 He who walks with the wise grows wise, but a companion of fools suffers harm.

Amos 3:3 Do two walk together unless they have agreed to do so?

Matt 7:13 Enter through the narrow gate. For wide is the gate and broad is the road that leads to destruction, and many enter through it. 14 But small is the gate and narrow the road that leads to life, and only a few find it.

Recognizing the influence your associations can have, the biblical authors (especially in Proverbs) condemn bad associations and commend good associations.

• Prohibitions to having bad associations, because they often entail some in harm, loss, or disadvantage

Ps 1:1 Blessed is the man who does not walk in the counsel of the wicked or stand in the way of sinners or sit in the seat of mockers.

Ps 106:35 but they mingled with the nations and adopted their customs.

Prov 4:14 Do not set foot on the path of the wicked or walk in the way of evil men.

Prov 14:7 Stay away from a foolish man, for you will not find knowledge on his lips.

Prov 16:29 A violent man entices his neighbor and leads him down a path that is not good.

Prov 22:24 Do not make friends with a hot-tempered man, do not associate with one easily angered, 25 or you may learn his ways and get yourself ensnared.

Prov 23:20 Do not join those who drink too much wine or gorge themselves on meat,

Prov 24:1 Do not envy wicked men, do not desire their company; 2 for their hearts plot violence, and their lips talk about making trouble.

Prov 24:21 Fear the LORD and the king, my son, and do not join with the rebellious, 22 for those two will send sudden destruction upon them, and who knows what calamities they can bring?

Prov 25:5 remove the wicked from the king's presence, and his throne will be established through righteousness.

Prov 28:7 He who keeps the law is a discerning son, but a companion of gluttons disgraces his father.

Prov 29:3 A man who loves wisdom brings joy to his father, but a companion of prostitutes squanders his wealth.

Prov 29:24 The accomplice of a thief is his own enemy; he is put under oath and dare not testify.

Rom 12:2a Do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind.

1 Cor 5:6b Don't you know that a little yeast works through the whole batch of dough? 7a Get rid of the old yeast that you may be a new batch without yeast....

1 Cor 15:33 Do not be misled: "Bad company corrupts good character."

2 Cor 6:14 Do not be yoked together with unbelievers. For what do righteousness and wickedness have in common? Or what fellowship can light have with darkness?

• Admonitions to having good associations, because they often offer some help, benefit, or advantage

Ps 119:63 I am a friend to all who fear you, to all who follow your precepts.

Prov 11:14 For lack of guidance a nation falls, but many advisers make victory sure.

Prov 12:26 A righteous man is cautious in friendship, but the way of the wicked leads them astray.

Prov 13:10b ...wisdom is found in those who take advice.... 14 The teaching of the wise is a fountain of life, turning a man from the snares of death.

Prov 15:15b ...a wise man listens to advice.... 22 Plans fail for lack of counsel, but with many advisers they succeed.... 31 He who listens to a life-giving rebuke will be at home among the wise. 32 He who ignores discipline despises himself, but whoever heeds correction gains understanding.

Prov 20:18 Make plans by seeking advice; if you wage war, obtain guidance. Prov 24:6 for waging war you need guidance, and for victory many advisers. Heb 10:25 Let us not give up meeting together, as some are in the habit of doing, but let us encourage one another—and all the more as you see the Day approaching.

Sir 6:34 Stand in the assembly of the elders. Who is wise? Cleave to him. 35 Be ready to listen to every narrative, and do not let wise proverbs escape you. 36 If you see an intelligent man, visit him early; let your foot wear out his doorstep.

How independent are you? The associations you choose—and it is one of the few aspects of your life that you really control -is an indication of your character now and of the person you aspire to become.

For the Bibliography and Endnotes, see the pdf here.